I don’t get sick. Sick is something I hear about from other people who feel like crap and can hardly crawl to their beds. Imagine my shock (and denial) when I woke up this morning with the start of a sore throat that’s quite frankly now a throat on fire. I don’t have time for sick! I have things to do, places to be! Bet you’ve never had the same thought, huh?
When people on my teams would come to the office sick, I’d encourage them to go home. Why?
1) They need to get better to be and do their best
2) I didn’t want the entire team to catch their bug
3) There are other smart, resourceful and talented people who can step up, lead and get the work done
Following My Own Advice
Have you ever noticed that so many leaders will do the right thing and send their team members home to get better yet they still show up at the office with a sore throat, terrible cold or worse? Granted, most people inside of organizations have limited sick days or days that are in a PTO bucket they have mentally earmarked for an awesome vacation – not lying around in bed.
As a small business owner, I know that I have more flexibility than I ever did while working in corporate leadership but it also means limited people around to “cover me” while I take it easy.
It’s so hard to step out, even when we need to do it the most. All kinds of excuses come up like:
- I’m not that sick.
- People are counting on me.
- If I don’t do it, who will?
- My deadlines don’t disappear just because I’m sick!
Time for Sick
There is that in-between place of starting to feel the illness coming on and being totally down for the count and it’s hard to know when and if we’ll shift from one to the other. Despite the desire to push on, our bodies sometimes tell us what our minds refuse to hear:
- Slow down!
- Take it easy!
- I need to rest!
Listen when your body is telling you to rest even if you want to push through. Are you choosing short-term priorities over long-term wellness? Stop listening to the excuses instead of your own body.
Rest when you’re sick and come back stronger tomorrow. (Click to Tweet)
The Gift of a Sore Throat
I have no idea if my sore throat will become a full-on feeling yucky and laid-up illness. I still have energy, creativity and a lot to give to my family, clients and work. I’m caught in a moment of choice and opportunity:
Choice: Take it easy or push through
Question: How can I take it easy on my health AND push through?
Solution: Talk less, listen more, write more, sink into the silence more.
Instead of talking through all the experience I have to share, it’s an opportunity to embrace listening on an even deeper level. I’m not only talking about listening to my clients either…
It’s so easy to get caught up in doing, that we don’t make the time for being. Part of getting in touch with our way of being is letting go of the doing long enough to hear what’s going on inside of our own hearts and minds.
Today, I’m resting, writing, listening, and embracing my personal leadership under the weather. Truly, when you get quiet and still, is when you can see and hear the most that would otherwise pass you by in a blur.
Besides, if any of us are really that indispensable, there’s a problem. It’s time to be a leader that empowers others to step up and lead too. Maybe that under the weather feeling is just the catalyst you and I need to do just that.
The next time you feel sick, will you make an adjustment or keep on going full steam ahead?
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Alli, I so hear you! I am rarely, rarely sick. Three weeks ago I got bit by some kind of strange bug and was out of it for two full weeks! I decided to do more resting and less doing but it was a HARD choice! ..I hope you feel better soon!
Two weeks! Must have been some kind of a bug! I’m on day two and I’m ready to feel like myself again tomorrow. It is a hard choice but such a critical one to make.
Thanks, Chery! Glad you’re feeling well again!
Tis the season!
So sorry that you’ve been hit with this ‘bug’ too Alli! Looks like Chery got sick about the same time I did. Came on suddenly and knocked me out flat within a couple of days. I don’t want this bug back again any time soon!
Glad to hear you are on the mend! xo
Ugh! It’s funny how frustrated I’ve been about getting sick and slowing down but now, well into a lingering cold, I’m embracing permission to take care of myself and know that means I’m taking care of others in the process.
Glad you’re feeling better too!
Hi Alli, the post did bring a smile – I think we’ve all been there and you’re right – it is SO much easier to do the right thing for members of our team and overlook ourselves.
I absolutely agree with your comment…’Besides, if any of us are really that indispensable, there’s a problem.’
When I would be having those internal arguments about resting vs. working, one way that almost always worked was the reality that if I go into work and am contagious, I will infect the people I care deeply about – I didn’t want any of them to get what I had.
Enjoy a restful weekend (hot tea, honey, & lemon)
Best regards,
Carl
@SparktheAction
Thanks, Carl! My kitchen is fully stocked with no less than 10 kinds of teas at the moment and working my way through them.
Truly, it is caring for others when we step back, stay home, and care for ourselves. Love how you won the internal argument!
Appreciate your insights and experience!
How a leader handles getting sick may relate to their leadership approach. For those that always need to be in control, they will not go home sick. They will just muddle through. For those who are comfortable in their leadership ways, they will go home and trust the people around them. Just another way to take someone’s leadership temperature!
Thanks, Alli!
Have me laughing with taking the leaders temperature but it’s an excellent metaphor to carry through in this instance. What is it really saying when someone thinks that things could not possibly go on without them and it’s worth getting others sick too. Really? Not the kind of leader I want to be nor one I’d admire. In fact, over the course of my career, I’ve told many of my bosses to go, head home and take care of themselves – we had it covered.
Thanks so much, Jon!
Thanks for this great post illuminating all of the good things that can happen when we truly take care of ourselves. Feel better soon, dear one!
If only it wasn’t a hard choice at all to practice self-care. Hummm.
I’m already starting to feel a lot better. Have a wonderful family that’s taking good care of me!
Thanks, Blair!
I will make an adjustment:)…as I trust you will. If it wasn’t morning here, I’d suggest a good single malt scotch, a great book and a curl up under fluffy covers. Hmmmm…I suggest it anyway. Feel better soon my friend. Cheers! Kaarina
Definitely did my share of napping today. Now malt scotch – that may do the trick. Wonder if a beer will work as well? Sometimes you’ve got to go with what you have in the house. 😉
Really great post, Alli. Take some time to get better. Small illnesses can become big ones. Those teas that you’re thinking about will probably be very helpful. Don’t forget the honey (a great throat soother).
Absolutely true, Joy. Small illnesses can quickly become big ones. I’ve always been that parent that keeps my child home from school when they’re sick too because I ask myself if I’d be happy if another parent sent their child in the same condition.
Tea-ing it up over here!
Thanks, Joy!
Great reminder, Alli, that often we drive ourselves too hard! And I love Jon Mertz’s observation that for many leaders their desire to be in control over-rides their sore throat and high temps! That said, take care of yourself and know that many folks around the world care for you and miss your sunny smile!
LaRae – I agree, Jon’s way of putting it is incredibly clear and says a lot about a leader.
Social media is amazing – so many of us now have friends around the world that truly care and I certainly feel it.
Appreciate you!
Great post, Alli, in pointing out the double standards so many of us have. While I no longer tough it out by going to work when I’m sick, I do still feel guilty about taking a sick day. In fact a few weeks ago, I came home from a tiring business trip to Florida sick and feeling shaken up by having been rear-ended on my way home from the airport at 11:15pm at night. I was going to tough it out at home–I didn’t feel up to driving into the office, nor did I want to pass on my bug–until my boss explicitly said that it’s important to him that I took care of myself and get well that I took the rest of the day off. I still dragged myself to the office the day after, and everyone could tell I was in bad shape. Finally, after lunch, my boss sent me home and told me explicitly how he was going to cover what I felt I needed to do. That was when I was reminded that it wasn’t that people needed me. It was the other way around. I hated feeling vulnerable, so I felt I had to be responsible and “be there” for others, so that I could feel more powerful. I ended up going home early and took the rest of the weekend off. Anyway, that’s my way of agreeing with you–that none of us are truly indispensable. Our belief in so is really that we’re afraid of being unimportant. Thanks again, Alli!
First of all, I love your boss. Helping people prioritize self-care, letting them know it really is OK is all too rare. I absolutely think you hit on something so important with vulnerability. I don’t like to be sick because I am “the strong one” that keeps things going. Beyond feeling unimportant, I don’t like to feel weak. Lots to learn from your story – thanks for sharing it here, Alice!
Hope you feel better. Glad you gave yourself permission to rest.
Slow and steady. Getting better but wish it would happen faster! Thanks, Karin!
Hi Alli,
I can soooo relate to this post! I never get sick – everyone in my family knows this…I just won’t allow it. 🙂 So when I started get a monster sore throat on our vacation this year, I was in shock. I completely agree with you that when we do get sick (and yes, it does happen to all of us) it is important we listen to our bodies and take the time needed to recover. Not only is it a blessing to all our co-workers – it is a huge blessing to ourselves. As hard as it is to admit, sometime we really need that time to take a look at what threw us off balance. Being sick can be used to gain perspective on our lives.
I discovered that my sore throat had a lot to do with some really old ugly memories of my past that going to Hawaii had stirred up for me. I had never really expressed some of the pent up pain and confusion from this part of my childhood and it created a big block in my throat. Being a family vacation I had the opportunity to share these feelings with my wonderful husband and understanding kids. They gave me tremendous support and some really great perspectives on all of it as well. I found the whole experience brought us so much closer. I wouldn’t ask for that again…but it was truly a life altering experience.
I hope you get some great time for you Alli – nothing like our bodies forcing us to rest and find our balance again! 🙂 Get better soon!!
Over a week later, I’m still sick. So interesting to consider that yes, I have a bug that’s pulling me down but what else is pulling me down, calling me to rest, and zapping my energy?
Karen, your story is fantastic. Reminds me of just how closely our physical well-being is connected to something undefinable within us – heart, soul, core…
Sounds like your trip to Hawaii was wonderful in so many different ways. Glad your sore throat was replaced by vulnerability, connection and much love from your family.
xoxo