More cars were driving around in circles than spaces in the lot. We were I a long line that moved slower than a snail. Each one of us hoped that the next space to open would be ours.
I was in the line first! I was polite and let that person in front of me. Now they’re in, and I’m not.
They pulled through the other side! I didn’t see them coming. No fair!
If I have to pull to the upper deck, I’ll be that much farther from where I want to go.
Finally, turn two around the lot, the car ahead of me didn’t see someone about to back out. I stopped; waited. Who cared that there were 9,000 cars behind me? Mine!
Apparently, reverse lights mean nothing. Maybe they were checking their texts or making a call, all I know is there was no sense of urgency to leave. They pulled out of the spot for what felt like roughly ten years. Back up, forward, back an inch, move ahead. Ready to go, they still took forever to get out. However, my patience paid off, the newly empty spot was on my right and I inched forward.
Darn.
It was next to a pole, and the car next to it parked so close to the line I’d never be able to open my door. Why did I have to drive an SUV! Why didn’t I have a tiny little car to zip around town?
Yes, the spot was open but it wasn’t meant for me. I kept going.
I thought about going to the competitor’s store down the street. It didn’t matter that I had a preference for this one. If I didn’t get a spot soon, I wasn’t waiting forever, watch me go.
Finally, like magic, there it was, my place. I pulled in and fit perfectly.
Are You Circling the Career Parking Lot?
My friend, Jen, was circling the lot in her career. Consistently told she’d be the next person promoted, she wasn’t.
It wasn’t a great fit for you.
Soon. Hang in there.
We want you here, please don’t leave. Give us a little more time.
Before long, the person who’s in that position now will leave, and it’s yours.
Like Jen, I worked for a senior leader who would tell me, “You’re perfect. If Meg gets hit by a truck, it’s yours.”
Uh, I liked Meg. Didn’t want her to get hit by a truck even if I didn’t like her.
I stayed.
A promotion was high on my radar but not the only reason I was there. My day-to-day work, the people on the team, they were why I chose to keep circling, keep waiting.
I wasn’t wasting time, but building skills, relationships, and gaining visibility. My career story was more than a series of promotions.
Waiting? No. Positioning.
After a while, the perfect space did open. It wasn’t the one I thought it would be but a far better one. The good news was that I was the right person.
Thank goodness I did more than kill time, get frustrated, and build resentment when I saw my capable colleagues get promoted. They deserved it, and if I’m honest, I would have hated most of the positions they filled.
10 Powerful Questions to Ask Yourself While You’re Waiting for Your Space
We all have choices.
If you’re waiting for the perfect career spot while others seem to find their’s faster and with more ease, ask yourself the following questions:
- What’s my timeline?
- Do I want to leave?
- What’s the risk if I hang in there?
- Is there somewhere else I can park while I wait?
- What’s the potential payoff?
- Can I trust that eventually, the right spot will open for me here?
- What are my options?
- Are there other actions I can take
so the next spot to open up is mine?
- Who can help me?
- What’s the downside? Upside?
What will you choose? Uncovering your next step is up to you. If you decide to wait, that’s ok as long as it’s a choice. Waiting doesn’t mean wasting time. Choose to go? Do so on purpose and not out of anger or spite.
Hi Alli,
Great distinction between circling and positioning. Truly great difference. And then as you pointed out — the tough question — how to know which one you are doing.
I wonder sometimes if we can only know after we have “circled” a little bit. I think the frustration that comes w/ circling leads us to explore and ask the question, “Which am I doing?” Then your excellent list is ready and available to guide everyone in the decision.
Unique post with a fine insight to a pesky problem everyone faces. Kudos!
Kate
Great addition, Kate. It’s often those frustrating experiences that open us to questioning what we’re doing and why. Even then, we need to be honest with ourselves. Admitting we’re circling can be scary because that means making another choice.
Alli
Alli,
Spot on. I work with a few folks in helping them with their career transitions and have forwarded this on to them for their enlightenment. Yes, enlightenment. You shine the spotlight directly on the issues that some of them face, thus spot on! I’ll stop with the word play and share this with others as I believe you have once again hit that proverbial nail squarely on its little head. Ker Bam! Thanks, my friend.
Many thanks, Gary! Transitions can be tough (even when they’re our choice!) I know you’re one who’s as passionate about change as I am…
Alli
What a perfect post to begin my day! Waiting for that perfect spot can be so demotivating and cause such anxiety in us. I love your question: “Is there somewhere else I can park while I wait?” Honestly that’s what our professional lives and careers are all about. There really isn’t just one job for each of us. I have tried out several different strategies while positioning myself for my next crossroad. Just keep moving and realize that the perfect spot is right in front of us!
Thanks Alli and will share!
Well said, Terri! We will pull in and out of spaces over the course of our careers. Each one isn’t meant to be forever. Love the image of positioning for your next crossroad. It’s important to continue to grow, challenge and build our skills along the way since we never know when that crossroad will appear.
Alli
I’ve frequently found myself circling because I just wanted something convenient or it sounded like it might be a great next move. The problem with circling, I found, is that the focus is on that one position and I forget a couple of things: 1) maybe that spot isn’t where I really needed to be, and 2) I lost sight of other possibilities because my eyes were directed on that one spot. I love your recommendation to “position” instead of “circle.” Great article and I’ll share with my community.
I can definitely relate, LaRae. In fact, the idea of being so focused on where we think we should be and missing all of the other options and opportunities has come up a few times in my recent conversations. Always appreciate your additions and insights!
Alli